Loud Commercials: A Menace To Our Nation

One year ago, Congress finally set aside it's partisan bickering to deal with an issue that affects the quality of life of every citizen of our nation.  They passed a law that took a bold step to deal with a menace.  And today, the Federal Communications Commission released the rules by which it will enforce this law and end the scourge.

That scourge is...loud TV commercials.

I know what you're thinking.  "Curtie, loud commercials are REALLY annoying!  I mean, I can't even enjoy my favorite TV show without having my sensitive eardrums overwhelmed by high-decibel Sham-Wow commercials!"  You're damn right they are annoying, and thank our lucky stars that our elected officials and the regulatory officials they appoint have taken action!

Because let's face it, we're Americans dammit.  We shouldn't have to put up with this crap!  We have been endowed by our creators with certain inalienable rights, including life, liberty, and the pursuit of "Glee".  And to achieve these inalienable rights we should NOT have to move our thumb to turn the volume up or down, or to hit the mute button.  After all, what did our soldiers fight and die for on the beaches of Normandy, or the sands of Iraq?  Freedom...freedom from annoyance.

Some skeptics may bemoan the fact that our lawmakers can tackle loud commercials and not issues such as growing income inequity and skyrocketing debt.  But really, does that surprise anyone?  After all, those issues and many others are ones where our elected officials don't agree on solutions.  But EVERYONE agrees that TV commercials are too loud!  Plus, elected officials respond to input from citizens.  When half of citizens say raise taxes and the other half say lower spending, what are they supposed to do?  But when 100% of the citizens say commercials are too loud, that's an easy call.

Since we've established that Congress cannot tackle difficult issues but can handle the "slam dunks", here are some other pieces of legislation I'd like to see my government consider.  Each one of these laws would rid us of some pesky annoyances in our lives that (unlike excessive debt and crumbling infrastructure), our nation should NOT tolerate.

• The Mattress and Pillow Freedom Act:  This law would outlaw the placement of those annoying tags on mattresses and pillows.  We Americans are tired of dealing with the stress of whether or not we'll be arrested if we remove them, so let's pass a law that doesn't allow them in the first place!
• The Unnecessary Packaging Act:  This would make it illegal for manufacturers to put a product in a package that requires scissors to open.  Just think of how many broken nails can be saved?
• The FFFF Act (Freedom From Flip-Flops):  This law would outlaw this annoying form of footwear from any workplace, thereby saving our ears from the sound of people walking by our cubicle with them on.  

I'm sure everyone has some things that annoy them from time to time.  So, make your own list and contact your congressperson or senator.  Chances are they are bored of disagreeing about how to tackle the big problems and would welcome the opportunity to bring something back to their constituents.

Better yet, run for Congress yourself!  Since the title of my blog is "What's Buggin' Curtie", that could be my entire platform when I run for Congress.  "If elected, I will only work on legislation that will make you like me.  Because what's buggin' Curtie is what's buggin' you, and I'm gonna do something about it!"